LeadForward Vol.1 No. 1

Culture

Seeing the System How Bowen Theory Transformed My Leadership Lens By Hugh Ballou

When I first encountered Bowen Family Systems Theory, I wasn’t in a therapy session or counseling course—I was leading teams. At the time, I was wrestling with a growing nonprofit I had founded, and no leadership book or communication seminar seemed to quite explain why certain relational dynamics kept cycling through my team. But Bowen did. And not just in theory—Bowen helped me see the system. I have studied and continue to be connected to Dr. Roberta Gilbert, who is one of Dr. Bowen’s lead advocates. Through Dr. Gilbert’s coaching, I’ve carried Bowen's framework into boardrooms, staff

learn to recognize the patterns— triangles, differentiation, chronic anxiety—you can lead more effectively, calmly, and with far less wasted energy. I want to reflect on meetings and training rooms, and for years, I can clearly see the effects of Dr. Gilbert’s training on the Bowen Family Systems. The insight is simple, yet revolutionary: organizations, like families, are emotional systems. And once youon three key principles I’ve learned from applying a cultural lens to Bowen theory in organizations—especially in an era when leaders are navigating

not just tasks, but identity, inclusion, and legacy. Triangling Isn’t Just for Families —It’s the Backbone of Office Drama One of the earliest insights I picked up from Bowen Theory was the idea of a triangle: when two people in a system are uncomfortable with each other, they draw in a third to relieve the tension. It’s not malicious. It’s automatic. It’s emotional thermodynamics. In organizations, triangles are everywhere: A frustrated employee goes to a peer instead of their supervisor.

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