BHS Inkwell 2017-2018

The Test By Ella Goldschmidt

Kent Smith

I stared at the characters on the ugly, beige paper in front of me. I squinted and waited until the letters swam together to spell out, What does the word “consternation” mean in line 6-8? I read the question over again. I turned the words around in my head until I felt a dull throbbing behind my eyes. Gently turning the page back, I reread the passage. Professor Dempsey of the Washington National Academy for High Musical Appreciation remarks that much of contemporary Neo-prebaroque music tends to change time every bar, typically alternating from simple duple meter to hemidemisemiquaver. Constructing music in such a manner allows for listeners to savor the adagio measures while introducing an element of consternation to awaken the audience. I pondered the word “consternation” as I glanced at the possible answers: (a) A shade of periwinkle (b) a contemporary Neo-prebaroque instrumental technique (c) equating to the feeling of being impaled aroma of freshly sharpened number two pencils and test packets with the subtle but familiar stink of adolescent sweat and stress.The pain behind my eyes had not subsided and was further aggravated by the chorus of frantically flipping pages and sniffling noses from the corners of the musty classroom. I peered at the round and rosy-cheeked proctor at the head of the room. She smiled cheerily at the grey sky outside. Her eyes gently flitted down to her watch, then she smiled a toothy grin, shiny enough to reflect the paisley pattern of her dress. She announced,“You have 15 minutes left before we begin the next section.” I looked down to see that I had barely completed 15 questions with 30 remaining. I felt a pit of panic develop in my stomach.The pounding pain behind my eyes grew stronger as my mind raced to create a clever plot to complete 30 questions in a quarter of an hour. 14 minutes flashed by. Time always seems to know when to speed up, especially when students are taking important, timed examinations. I only had completed five more problems. I could have attempted to suddenly in occipital lobe (d) The smell of Professor Demsey’s detergent A sigh escaped my mouth as I inhaled the

finish the remainder of the problems at the speed of one problem per second, which would have been improbable, but not impossible. Instead I stared dumbly at the hideous beige paper. I sank into the mindless void of standardized testing until DING! The shrill call of the bell brought me to my senses, though my head ached and my heart pounded. “Alright! Please put down your pencils and close your test booklets. A five minute break will commence NOW!”The crimson-cheeked woman exclaimed almost threateningly. I felt a little “consternation” then, assuming that “consternation” meant “equating to the feeling of being impaled suddenly in the occipital lobe.”The throbbing pain behind my eyes worsened. I couldn’t remove the mental image of the utter beige of the test booklet. It was inconceivably beige- beige beyond my comprehension. I felt queasy and defeated, despite the fact that I only had completed a mere fourth of the disastrous examination. I felt as if a pitchfork had punctured my esophagus. If the devil ever devised a perfect torture, this would be worse than that by tenfold. I stared at my closed booklet, and it stared menacingly back at me.The paisley-clad proctor sniffed the air curtly and gestured to the clock.

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